Holiday Party Rules

Posted on December 15, 2017 in Consulting

This week, WKPZ held its annual firm luncheon.  Our holiday celebration is a very nice and — I must confess — extraordinarily tame event.   But others would say that tame translates to “lame” as there is one obvious thing missing at our luncheon:  booze.   I should also admit that I am a social drinker, and please, those who really know me need not comment further.  Thus, I cast no dispersions on companies who gather and have fun with alcohol included.  But let me suggest some simple holiday party rules.

Rule One: Uber

Everyone who plans to drink at their holiday event should be compelled to use Uber (or a taxi)… without exception. Companies should not pretend to know when someone is safe to drive home.   We lack the expertise.  Instead, make the rule absolute:  you drink, you Uber.  It’s simple and effective.  Doing otherwise is irresponsible and potentially dangerous.  Consider a NYT article that reported a 25-35% decline in DUI related accidents in the New York boroughs after Uber arrived. Closer to home, Austin (Texas) experienced a sizable increase in DUI arrests after its battles with ride sharing programs led Uber (and Lyft) to leave our liberal capital.

Rule Two: Eliminate the After Party

Rule One and Rule Two fail miserably if someone instigates the “after party”.  That someone should never be management.  We cannot stop co-workers from having fun by extending a party beyond the Company’s intentions.   However, no one in management should initiate (and by no means) attend the “after party”.

Rule Three: Have a Good Cop

A responsible person in authority needs to be the designated good cop.  This person walks around the party watching for any individuals who have forgotten the rules, had too much to drink, or just suddenly felt amorous about their co-worker.  Yes, it turns out alcohol sometimes leads to flirtations and uninhibited courage.  The Good Cop takes one for the team and abstains from alcohol.  And, most important, the Good Cop makes sure Rule One and Two are enforced.

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